đź’” Korea breaking up with Tesla

Weekly crypto update: Solana upgraded its protocol, Korea shifted billions to crypto, Google dodged a breakup, and Newsom started a Trump-related meme coin.

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YOUR WEEKLY DOSE OF CRYPTO WISDOM AND ENTERTAINMENT

Hey Hodlers, how’s it going?

We’re back with your weekly crypto news. It’s been a busy week, and there’s plenty to catch up on. Solana rolled out its Alpenglow upgrade, making transactions faster than ever. Korean investors moved billions out of Tesla and into crypto, showing where their bets are now. Google managed to avoid a breakup, keeping its empire intact, and Gavin Newsom stirred things up with a new Trump-themed meme coin.

Stick around, we’ve got all the highlights and key takeaways you need to stay in the loop.

NEWS NEWS NEWS

đź’¸ Korea Says Bye Tesla, Hello Crypto!

In a plot twist worthy of a K-drama, South Korean investors pulled $657M out of Tesla in August—marking their biggest sell-off since 2023. Instead, they funneled a whopping $12B into US-listed crypto stocks, including Coinbase, Circle, Bitmine, and even an Ethereum ETF. Solid regulatory clarity at home has them tossing EVs aside and riding the crypto rocket. Analysts, watch your behinds—Korea’s on fire.

Break Up GIF by Unpopular Cartoonist

⚡ Solana: Speed Mode ACTIVATED

Solana just hit the NOS button with its Alpenglow protocol upgrade. With 98.3% validator approval, transaction confirmations are now a lightning-fast 150–200 ms—about five times faster than before. That’s right, your dApps and exchanges are going to feel snappier than ever. Expect testnet rollouts by December and a flashy mainnet debut in early 2026. Traders, buckle up!

The Office Kevin GIF

🕶️ “Google Never Had Chrome Issues—Literally Saved It”

Antitrust drama update: a U.S. judge ruled that Google doesn’t have to be chopped up despite its monopoly antics—Chrome and Android are safe! However, they must ditch exclusive search deals and share some search data with rivals for 6 years. Investors cheered; Alphabet shares soared (~9%). AI rising fast means full-blown breakups are so last decade.

Oh No Internet GIF by Loof and Timmy

🤡 â€śGavin’s Meme Coin Battle Royale vs Trump”

Governator turned meme maestro! Gavin Newsom is cooking up a spicy revenge with the “Trump Corruption Coin”, aiming to dunk on Trump’s flop coin. TRUMP still lingers as the 77th-largest crypto at around $8, but Newsom’s token is arriving with a smirk and a spreadsheet. Grab your popcorn—this is meme-coin theater.

Gavin Newsom GIF by GIPHY News

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THE WEEKLY SHOWCASE OF EPIC TWEETS

FOLLOW OUR SOCIAL MEDIA:

  • X - Where Crypto Meets Comedy;

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Disclaimer: We're here to entertain, not to be your financial guru. This newsletter is purely for educational purposes and does not constitute financial advice or a magical fortune-telling session. So, grab your popcorn, enjoy the read, but remember to use your own wits and conduct thorough research before making any money moves. Stay curious, my friends!